True to its name, Goat Simulator starts you innocently enough: in a goat pen, with nothing but a sticky tongue and a hard skull to your name. Across the street, some protesters are holding a rally. You ram a lamppost into the crowd and headbutt the survivors, glitching several feet backwards as you try to lick one of their signs: NO PENIS SHAPED FOOD. An empty pool filled with trampolines is just down the road. You bounce across them and into a construction site, where you find a jetpack....
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